nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize