bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
handjob tips. give me some.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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