He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
