he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Two words: blizzard sex
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
