Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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