My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
So vagazzling was a success
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
