Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize