I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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