grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
me + whiskey = a bad person
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize