grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
It was confusing and full of hummus
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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