i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
