I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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