If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize