North Korea, Best Korea!
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
My Higher Power is John Stamos
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
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