i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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