BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
