Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
