there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize
