I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Randomize
