I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
