I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
