im gay
i know
yea but for you.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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