good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Randomize
