Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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