I want to make a zoo with you.
no, he came in my armpit
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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