Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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