I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Actions speak louder than pants.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
