so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
