I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize