Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
