it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize