bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
North Korea, Best Korea!
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize
