i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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