I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
