Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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