i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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