i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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