doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
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