It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
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