Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
did you just send me my own nude
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
