butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
