dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
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