if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Randomize