It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
do herpes really smell.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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