So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize