i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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