best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
