Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
