just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
