saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
